the uncertainity within;

............................................................... 50%

met with a customer today who has superb english.. an example would be the way she went rrrrrright, pronouncing the r so throughly when she said it, it makes my command of english looks weak and i hate it.. so im going to brush my english, im armed with books (like finally, i haven get to read a decent book in ages) and they are by nora roberts, i love her! she's an awesome author who writes great books.. =D

i'm sorry.. i disappointed u, i know that clearly.. ur voice was filled thick with disappointment when i didnt said yes immediately and said i would think over it and get back to u.. u tried to disguise it, but i still felt it.. u offered something that i really quite wanted recently on a plate, handing it over neatly over to me, but i rejected.. but at that point of time, i really couldnt said yes, juz felt compelled to consider it seriously over before i gave an answer.. i no longer can readily answered yes anymore.. im not the girl that u first knew last year, to hell with it, i wasnt even the same girl as 3 months ago in terms in thinking and mentality.. things have changed, circumstances have changed, my feelings towards it have changed, so did my thinking towards it.. it had nv ever been the surface that u guys saw and thought u understood, it had nv been that way.. with the place gone, along with it went the remaining pieces and shreds that i once had for it.. its no longer present anymore.. thus dun keep ur hopes up on me anymore, i noe u wouldnt, judging by ur character.. i have no idea how all these will go from here, but deep down, i noe its nowhere near positive.. so tata and so long..

daddy, u are the first guy that i ever depended and relied on both mentally and monetary.. monetary cuz i have nv ever ask a guy for treats or anything that involves money, (u should have seen the lengths that i gone to reject monetary offers) mentally cuz i lean on u for support and disclose all kind of things to u.. even those that are close to my heart and those i would nv ever wear them on my sleeve, but u know, cuz i told u.. this is trust. complete confidence and complete trust i have in u, u earned it. by means of being able to get it is no mean feat, but u did. u could even read me like an open book, not even my sisters can do it. dun be honoured or glad, cuz its nothing much to be happy about. cuz along with all these comes responsibilities. the faith of me in u that u would nv ever leak anything on me to anyone else, and i really mean anyone, no one should know, including the people that are invloved in the matter. a small mistake will juz destroy everything, by means a small mistake meaning even one that could actually be forgiven and be over and done with a nice treat of meal, once its done, nothing will ever be the same again. its juz a piece of glass, no matter how small a crack it has on it, it is still a crack. and no matter how properly it has being mended, it was once there, and traces of evidence would be found no matter how faint. i have no idea how would u take this after reading, but this is really wat i wanna say. dun ever betray my trust, or even if u accidentally did, u better pray that i dun find out, cuz u will never ever love the consequences.

*life's a bitch, so fuck off bitch*
*i hate the way that u are able to make me feel this way and do wat i am doing now*

♥ metamorphosis;

doodle straight into my heart 10:37 PM

melissa =)
22nd sept

darlings
him <3
kate spade
burberry
purple & colours
dancing
heels
shopping
checks and podka dots

creepy crawlies

travel around the world
have my own fashion line
dancing lessons
shop till i drop
moolah to drop from the sky and straight into my wallet =D

charlene
cheng de
jason
liyi
kaiyi
zi ting
xinyi

designer- joy.deprived

images&brushes - deviantart

artists - FaerieNymph, kedralynn (deviantart)

brushes - exotika, sunira, cruiza, elizavet (deviantart)

fonts - dafont

software - Adobe Photoshop 7.0 & Macromedia Dreamweaver 8.0

*please keep the credits as they are =) thankyou.